I wander because

In continuation to my last post –

https://thepalettedelights.wordpress.com/2017/05/07/i-wander-why/

 

My explorations have started and in the course of my journey, I am eager solve those blocks which are disturbing my views to know my own conflicts, ideas and unknown visions…
The Odyssey is on… I am waiting to tour those routes… And waiting to pen those roads…

 

In the midst of daily chores, endless targets, perplexed musings running across my mind I try to creep in to the silence of my own being to solve my restlessness. There is something beyond my accessible terrains, where I can expand my awareness, where I can be free, where I am not lost. I feel that sometimes there is a need to travel within to know, understand and realise that indistinct vacuity of your own space; something which is hiding in you, something real, unknown but again not less than ordinary. And for that, it is required to wither away from the constant clamour of the surroundings and dig into your core. But! Can you find it? Can you extract it out? Can you liberate it? No! There lies a problem.

 

We as individuals are so absorbed in this eternal, external and incognito noise, that we are unable to stand still in our mind, heart and soul to relax and stay calm. There is so much happening around us. The influx of over flowing information is so much that a human mind is truly unable to handle it, process it and obviously implement it. We are chasing a never ending race in this maddening crowd. We are not sure about the purpose but since we don’t want to ‘miss out’ anything, no matter how relevant or irrelevant the issues are, we are sub consciously forcing ourselves to be in the game.

 

The world is bombarded with new avenues, new opportunities and new possibilities, that we are in the tendency to grab everything into us. Be it Smartphone explosions, social media platforms or rapid globalisation, everything has so much to offer, that by end of the day our brains are so drained to go beyond what is ‘visible’. Everything seems to be artificial, though technology bridges gaps between relations; we are constantly missing a ‘personal touch’. And there I am able to identify the issues what I am going through.

 

The world is moving so fast, everyone including me is mesmerised with the process and somewhere down the line we have forgotten to pause and live in the moment. It has been written many times, but what I am feeling that in this due course, I am losing myself to the world. I am so engulfed with everything around me; that I have elapsed to discover new paths for my journey. Everything looks so fake, unreal and insane. I miss those real conversations, those real relations and those real feelings.  I miss that touch! I miss that heart-to-heart tête-à-tête. Everyone is immersed in chasing the mad pursuit; no one has ‘real time’ to have real discussions. I want to break free! I want to smile even when no one is looking at me. I want to dance even if there is no music. I want to travel even when there is no defined destination. I want to enjoy ‘real’ life. I want to move away from this camouflaged race.

 

My realisations have started exploring my journey, I am eager to learn more, discover more and live more.

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I Wander Why!

I am somewhere these days! My interest in this synthetic world is fleeing in void.  My inclination floats every second and my restless mind is always in search for something. I do try to focus in the present moment but my thoughts flutter from every corner to an unreachable extent. I am definitely not in this world, not even in my world. I am living somewhere. My psyche travels to different spheres aiming to experience realms of imaginary contentment. And I don’t know why?

Lost in the humdrum of activities, I wonder where my undefined explorations are leading me to. What am I looking for? Am I waiting for that flower to blossom or I just want to stay fine by enjoying the smell of fresh grass? Do I want rains or do I want to glow in the sunshine? Do I want to work myself to be attractive or whip myself in solitude?  Do I want to dance in high spirits or hide my insecurities from the maddening crowd?  What is it? What do I want? What to do? I am still figuring it out.
Nothing excites me, I am in the hunt of something new, unexplored and raw. I feel to reach those horizons where there is relatively unrefined emotions. That world, where you are far from judgments, inhibitions and apprehensions. Actually, for past many days, I feel that world is just over occupied, overwhelmed and over enthusiastic with the artificial environment. Everything looks camouflaged and is rumbled up in fabricated territory. My mind is scouting something which is natural, untouched but not less than ordinary. Something original, earthy and real.
My explorations have started and in the course of my journey, I am eager solve those blocks which are disturbing my views to know my own conflicts, ideas and unknown visions…
The Odyssey is on… I am waiting to tour those routes… And waiting to pen those roads…